The Etiquette Guide for Live UFC Events

the crowd is amped, the Octagon is lit up, and the air horn signals the start of the round. you've paid good money to watch the most skilled, exciting mixed martial artists tear it up right in front of you. and then you hear it: "jab! come on! jab!"

the young man two seats down is screaming 'advice' at Jose Aldo, one of the best fighters in the game right now.

"one, one two!" he yells, oblivious to the annoyed looks being thrown his way. perhaps all those whiskey coolers have clouded his judgment. otherwise he would realize that

1) Jose Aldo does not need boxing 101 advice
2) we're in the second level of the SkyDome and there's no way Aldo can hear him
3) even if Aldo needed the help and could hear it, he doesn't speak English.

this is number one on the etiquette list - do not try to coach the fighters and certainly do not repeatedly scream your expert tips at them throughout
the night. sure, discuss and analyze the fight with your friends and seatmates, if they choose to engage in such a conversation. but unless you're at least semi-professional or a member of a genuine fighting camp, keep the coaching to a minimum because you're just pissing off the spectators around you and making yourself look like a noob in the process.

number two - save the booing for boo-worthy moments. have you ever watched classic Pride fights? the Japanese crowd rarely boos. they rarely make any sounds, true, but there's far more respect for the fight in that audience. Western crowds boo when the fighters are pushing against the cage for 30 seconds. they boo when someone pulls guard and tries to control posture. and has it really come to this? they boo when someone is not born in the same country as them. WOW. enough. the SkyDome crowd wasn't as bad as some groups have been, and this was no small feat considering the sheer size of that crowd. but i still didn't want to be THAT audience. i was hoping for respectful, appreciative fans that judged the skill and the excitement and not the birth certificate. and on a side note, please learn the basics of the ground game prior to watching a live fight. if you want pure stand-up and nothing else, go watch K1 or boxing.

this is not an XBOX game or a highlight montage. real fights are strategic and calculated as well as exciting. if you could rise to the top of MMA just by scrapping and throwing haymakers, then well-muscled YouTube stars would own this sport. and they do not. there's often more going on in the moments between huge KOs or before amazing submissions. learn THAT game. because it's that footwork, those small postural changes, and that miniscule setup that sets the stage for the finishes you love.

UFC Fighters: the estrogen dilemma

"so is this your first event?"
"no, it's my third."
"third?! WOW. so do you actually like this stuff or do you just go with your boyfriend?"
"actually, i'm the one that got my husband into it. i've been watching UFC for over 10 years."
"really?! that's so rare!"

this was the actual conversation i had with the young buck next to me at UFC 129. everything i said was true. i grew up in a fighting family: my grandfather was a wrestler, my father did judo and boxing,and my brother is a TKD champ with experience in other arts as well. i started watching UFC around the time Zuffa took it over (2000 - 2001). tito ortiz was a brash, young up-and-comer and events took place every 4 - 6 months. acronyms like MMA, UFC and BJJ meant little to the 18 - 45 year old male population, let alone to the rest of the world.

i introduced the sport to friends, ex-boyfriends, and my then-boyfriend turned husband. and like my young seatmate said, this is not a common occurrence. because i grew up educated in fighting, i enjoyed the sport for its analysis as well as its entertainment. certainly being immersed in fighting paved the way towards my degree in kinesiology and my interest in athletic injuries. i was surrounded by competitive martial arts all my life and will continue to be always. i love MMA.

i'm glad that the sport has become so mainstream and that fighters are beginning to get the recognition and respect they deserve. but with an increase in popularity comes an increase in posers and wannabes. fight gear has become a status symbol - a sign of coolness and machismo. i was wary of donning certain brands because i knew i wasn't a fighter. my participation in recreational, non-competitive kickboxing did not count in my eyes. but i had no problem wearing the other more popular brands such as TapouT and Bad Boy because i knew i was a genuine fan, and one from the old generation at that.

there are few girls at live UFC events. the SkyDome held 55 000 people at UFC 129, and still i never had to wait in line at the ladies' room. i'm glad females are starting to get into it, not just as fans but as competitors as well. but i have one pet peeve that must be laid bare...

i am a girl and yes, i appreciate the athletic bodies and chiseled features of some of these fighters. but i'm first and foremost a fan of the skill, the attitude, and the personality - in that order. i was a fan of GSP since his inception into the UFC. he is the best all-around athlete in the sport right now. he evolves his game more efficiently than anyone else and is well-rounded to the point of being a cyborg. that is why i like him. even if he looked like Shrek or Marcus Davis, he would continue to be at the top of my favourites list because his physical appearance does not factor in for me. the fact that he's canadian holds more clout than his blue eyes and washboard abs.

it's totally okay that other gals are ga-ga over him. i understand and appreciate his ridiculous hotness too, don't get me wrong. but his looks are just an added bonus.

i am a fan of the fighter as i am a fan of the fight.

a beautiful smile and a six pack are just icing on the cake.

Trash Culture: a global epidemic

my morning routine is always accompanied by the live news program on channel 11. many tragedies, few triumphs, weather, sports, traffic, and entertainment. i don't mind the quick tour through entertainment news - i enjoy music and films, and will admit to a few sinful peeks through the celebrity gossip doorway. i do have growing concerns over our obsession with the people who entertain us...not only because it's extravagant and wasteful for us but also because it can have awful effects on the celebrities themselves (e.g. britney spears' rapid decline, the singular life of the late michael jackson, and the fatal drug addictions of a dozen american comedians). but this concern is overshadowed by my mounting hatred of Trash Culture - those disgusting, violent, pointless and utterly stupid exploits of barely-stars who have contributed little to the world of arts and entertainment, let alone to the world as a whole.

we fixate on the ridiculuous acts of has-been celebrities, providing them with far more TV and internet time than they deserve - and they feed and feed and feed on it like insatiable parasitic worms. 'celebrity' apprentice, 'celebrity' rehab and other significant TV programs showcase E, D, and F-list entertainers who barely qualify as asterisks let alone stars.

perhaps you're thinking that mr. charlie sheen's crazy ass is the inspiration for this rant. but no. it is one ms. lindsay lohan who is the root of all this rage. perhaps i should care more about the actress who provided us with such classics as Herbie Fully Loaded and Mean Girls? maybe my heart should soften for the co-star of Freaky Friday? (was that oscar-winning or just oscar-nominated...?)

DUIs, multiple motor vehicle accidents, failed stints at rehab, accusations of shoplifting, all at the tender age of 24. why do i know so much about ms. lohan's demise? because it's on the local news program i watch every morning, and maddeningly, it is accorded the same amount of time that actual news stories are given. i know just as much about robberies and murders down the street as i do about ms. lohan's poor life choices.

as i stated earlier, i don't mind hearing entertainment news. but this woman has contributed so little to the actual world of entertainment that it boggles my mind as to why so much time is allotted to her now. let the girl while away her penal time in private while allowing news channels stick to more worthy arts and culture stories.

our society is consumed by celebrity enough as it is; we might as well stick to genuine celebrities and leave the trash outside where it belongs.

Rango - a movie review

an enjoyable film that was just shy of extraordinary.

the expressiveness and emotion of the hardened desert critters was superb, which is likely thanks to the use of a new form of motion capture animation. it was like watching live actors in masks or makeup instead of PC-borne animated characters.

along with a mature vocabulary, there were a number of nightmare-inducing scenes that seemed to push this film from its rating of PG into a 14A: the hillbilly rodents climbing zombie-like out of the sand; the sinewy, unpredictable movements of Rattlesnake Jake; and certainly the violence and explosions of the obligatory chase scene. but even more adult than these grown-up frights was the pacing of the movie and truly, its overall message.

among the theatre-goers of that late show were a couple and their 4 or 5-year-old little lady. the visuals may have been captivating for her and the drawling creatures charming, but Rango was paced for an adult audience. foreshadowing and character-building abounded the film, and the storyline refused the frenetic speed of today's films for the ADD audience. two delightful cameos were absolutely intended for viewers that can vote or even viewers who have children that can vote (but i will not spoil those here).

the social commentary was not earth-shattering but it was shared in a contemplative manner that invoked equal amounts of discomfort and admiration. thus Rango joins the ranks of other eco-related calls to action...but it sidles into that line quietly, clicking its dusty spurs over an era that may be out of reach.

may be.

The King's Speech - a movie review

there's little i can add to the buzz about this Oscar-nominated film. the title itself may be twofold, referring to both the written words of King George VI as well as the manner in which he spoke them...or didn't speak them.

as with many theatre-goers, i was utterly charmed by the superb acting of Colin Firth and Geoffrey Rush. with such a gaping power differential between the two characters, their friendship should not have blossomed. but through thin insults, dry wit, and a lovely symbiotic dependence, their relationship deepened. Firth's portrayal of one with a speech-related disability was spot on and his vulnerability veiled beneath a quick temper brought me to tears.

i love period pieces: the opulent homes, the rich vocabulary, the gorgeous costumes. The King's Speech captured this formal yet luxurious life of the royals while maintaining the dark, fearful caution of a country on the edge of war. the film demonstrated the need for and power of unity in times of fear. it provided hope for people who feel their disability may never be overcome. it showed, in equal measure, the strength of words and the power of friendship.

Jordan John and the Blues Angels - a band review

"never trust a woman who loves the blues," sang one Mr. Ben Harper. although it implies something negative about myself, i do love that lyric. and i also love a skinny young man named Jordan John who captivated me during a live performance at the Groove Kitchen in Cambridge. he has a voice like Stevie Wonder and guitar-soloing abilities that would make any veteran blues player green with envy. there is wonderful chemistry between this leading man and the two other members of the Angels - partly due, i'm sure, to the fact that his bassist is also his father: the renowned and timeless, Prakash John. what a thrill it must be for a father to watch his son control this finicky genre with confidence and creativity.

Jordan's youth belies his incredible talent. both his vocal ornamentation and his ad libbing across the fret board are effortless and beautiful. it's clear that he was born to be on that stage. some people naturally have musical talent. they come into the world with golden voices and a penchant for coaxing melodies from a variety of instruments. Jordan is one of those who leaves the musically-minded in the dust. he is a virtuoso. and in the words of UFC commentator Joe Rogan, "this guy is FOR REAL."

as someone who was born and raised with music, i am not easily impressed by live musicians. sure i appreciate the effort they put in and i know i couldn't write a good song to save my life. but an open mic-er strumming out Wonderwall will not get a standing O from me. Jordan John and the Blues Angels on the other hand... if they don't have me on the edge of my seat, they have me standing, enthralled, in front of it.

trust me.

Black Swan - a movie review

one of my favourite things to observe in a film or novel is a character's descent into madness. i find it fascinating. it is not simply macabre entertainment for me; i am truly interested in the topic of mental illness and would love a position working with people who suffer from such disabilities.

Black Swan was a descent into madness that was simultaneously intense, horrifying and beautiful. at times, it was difficult to watch. the film itself was immersed in contrast after contrast: Black Swan/White Swan; pink bedroom/dark metropolis; childishness/lust. the line between reality and madness was not so much blurred as completely obliterated. many of the gorgeous visuals i originally interpreted to be symbolic: black feathers growing from Nina's slim arms, joints breaking to resemble the legs of a bird, painted icons that taunted and yelled. but after some thought, i believe these images were not symbolic at all. Nina's psychosis was indeed her reality. in the same way that a healthy mind works, the character's senses received information - as false it was - and her brain interpreted it. one may wonder if this or that scene actually happened, but truly, to the person with a severe and persistent mental illness, they are genuine experiences.

it was not the Black swan role that caused Nina's psychosis. prior to the audition, we are shown glimpses of her illness (although it did indeed come on full bore with the increased stress of her lead role). but unlike the majority of those with such mental difficulties, Nina achieved perfection and genius, the likes of which she may never have accomplished had she not descended into the Black.

i had a clinical placement in forensic psychiatry, providing therapy for people with severe and persistent mental illnesses who had committed crimes. one client's psychosis was successfully treated with medication but she told us she missed the voices - that they kept her company. if you asked the ghost of Nina: if you could choose to do it again, would you? knowing what would ultimately happen? i believe she would say yes. every time.